Life is so unfair, you were taken much too young. You were supposed to partly retire this year at 60 and put your feet up and enjoy a rest after all those years of hard grafting. You didn't get there Nath. To see you suffering and in pain, broke my heart every day. It was so cruel and devastating. I don't know how I have any tears left, but they keep coming. You said yourself "why me, I've always been a good person and never hurt a hair on anyone's head" You are so loved and respected by so many who are all asking the same "why poor Nathan, why?" I love you more than life itself and I'll miss you forever. It's unbearable to think of life without you with us. I keep thinking that you'll walk into the room, or I'll hear "hello gorgeous" one more time, or that warm cuddle will be felt. Every morning I wake up and for a moment, I imagine that you're still there next to me and then the reality dawns. The emptiness in my life, our home and bed, reminds me that the time that we had was so very precious and you've left such an enormous void that can never be filled. You have been my best friend, soulmate and the most wonderful husband, father, friend and grandad . You've always looked after me and I so loved looking after you. You were easy to love and always went along in life without complaining for making a fuss about anything. I have been so lucky to have shared my life with you. You were the happiest man with the biggest smile, always laughing and joking around. We've shared so many happy memories, parties, gatherings, holiday's, posh meals out and your favourite time of all was enjoying the company of our gorgeous son's and their families. You loved to chase our grandchildren round and round and the screams of laughter shouting out "Grandad" will make me smile for years to come. You were most happiest with your grandchildren in your arms. We've been so blessed and have lots to be grateful for.....but it's still not fair, you deserved so much more. I'll carry you in my heart and memories forever, We'll make sure that our family and grandchildren always have grandads love around them. You'll always be with us and thank you for the love you gave unconditionally to those you loved. Always and forever, my love will shine bright for you. See you again my darling Nathan xxx